Need Help?Need Help?

20 Questions: Does Your Family Need Help?
If you’re reading this the answer is most likely yes; but before you decide, ask
yourself the following questions and answer as honestly as you can.


  1. 1. Do you ever sink into feelings of hopelessness and despair in thinking
    about the future health of your family, especially when you consider the
    addictive habits of a loved one?

  2. 2. Have you made repeated attempts to effect change in your family, in
    relation to addictive behavior, without success?

  3. 3. Do you or any of your family members suffer from persistent anger, anxiety
    or depression relating to a family member’s drinking, drugging, or abusive
    behavior?

  4. 4. Do you experience frustration knowing that you’ve done everything in your
    power to help relieve someone else’s suffering and nothing has worked?

  5. 5. Have you come to the realization that you truly do not know what to do?

  6. 6. Are you ever embarrassed over a loved one’s behavior when in public or in
    the company of friends or other family members?

  7. 7. Has the fear of embarrassment led to social isolation?

  8. 8. Has your own health or welfare been compromised as the result of a family
    member’s out-of-control behavior?

  9. 9. Do you harbor growing resentment toward your loved one?

  10. 10. Do you feel over-responsible for the welfare of your family, taking up the
    slack of your partner’s failing?

  11. 11. Do you feel guilty that you haven’t done enough to prevent the chaos in
    your household?

  12. 12. Do you ever feel unsafe in the presence of an active family member?

  13. 13. Are you holding on to so many secrets that you’ve lost track of the truth?

  14. 14. Do you believe that your loved one’s behavior is having a negative effect
    on the entire family?

  15. 15. Are you ever up late worrying about where your loved one is, afraid that
    he or she may never return?

  16. 16. Do you ever think the current situation is your fault? If only you did or
    said _______ it would change?

  17. 17. Do you monitor your loved one’s behavior for signs of drinking or drug use
    or gambling or any other addictive, unhealthy behavior?

  18. 18. Have you lost trust in your loved one after repeated promises and failure
    to quit?

  19. 19. Do you "walk on eggshells" in the presence of your loved one, not wanting
    to set off a bout of rage or irrational behavior?

  20. 20. Are you ready to ask for help and be open to changing yourself as well as
    the addict?

If you’ve answered yes to most of these questions or relate in
some way to them, perhaps you are ready to take the
first step toward change and recovery.

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